Kuchiki Rukia no Yuutsu
by Mistress Symphony
Summary: AU! Ichigo is living a life of a normal highschooler. Well as normal as joining a bizarre club where you'll have to search for aliens, time travelers, sliders, espers and bunnies... did I mention reluctantly and forcefully?


**Title :** Kuchiki Rukia no Yuutsu  
**Author :** Meiko Kairi  
**Chapter Title :** (Prologue) I Believe

**Main Pairing :** IchigoxRukia

**Category :** Parody / Romance  
**Rating :** For Teen(s) – T; May contain language or scenes that are sensitive and not suitable for our very young readers!

**Warning(s) :** Possibly OOC randomness. Headache.

**Summary :** AU(?!) Ichigo is living a life of a normal highschooler. Well as "normal" as joining a bizarre club where you'll have to search for aliens, time travelers, sliders, espers and bunnies... did I mention reluctantly and forcefully?

**Standard Disclaimer :** Bleach Does Not Belong to Me.

**Inspired by : **Popular Suzumiya Haruhi Novel-Series by Nagaru-sensei.

- - -

"Asano-_san_," a strict and stern voice said pointedly.

If you're still stuck in a time where radio-drama is "in" one might think that the owner of the voice is holding fine leather whip finding its way to smack those who fail compliance.

Hard to imagine? Okay. Just think that you're listening to your favourite manga in Drama-CD version.

Er... aren't those two basically the same?

Whatever. I'm not an otaku (2).

Asano Keiko, sixteen years old gulped considerably and watched his own sweat roll down his nose. Don't freak out for the fact that I've described it almost unerringly. I could tell this because he is just a sit away from me and I've known him for ages.

He needs no more telling to do. He immediately rose from his chair and clutched his paper, looking constipated as he made his way to the podium.

He gulped and for a moment I knew : Breathing is last on his list.

"A-Anou..."

A loud crash of a palm against the table that almost sounded like a whip came and all of us couldn't help but to squint our eyes as a reaction. "Didn't I tell you not to stutter?"

"I'm sorry sensei..." he helplessly grumbled, his head was so low that I thought it was gonna break anytime.

I think this is the first time I see him like that so I shot him a sympathetic look. Unfortunately, he didn't notice my rare showing of care for a friend and kept staring at the floor.

She tapped her foot impatiently. The bitch seemed not to have any guilt at all.

"What are you waiting for!? Read you're godforsaken essay!"

"H-Hai!"

Today's the first day of our high-school days. The scary sensei is Akuma-sensei (3). Bah. She lives up to her name, doesn't she?

Anyway, instead of the usual friendly introduction, this devilish sensei gave us already a seatwork to write an essay about our biggest fears and tortured us even more by saying that she's our homeroom adviser.

"M-My biggest fear are shinigamis (4) b-because – "

"Shinigamis?" Akuma-sensei echoed in sarcasm as she cut Asano Keigo's so-called speech that wasn't even starting. "You still believe in those stuffs? How un-high-school-like of you. Those things aren't real,"

I clenched the pen I was holding. Did she make us do this stupid seatwork just to mock at us?

I don't believe in shinigamis, I mean I see ghosts here and there but I've never-ever seen a strange hunchbacked monster in black hooded cloak with a blade like the one that farmers' use when it's time to harvest, but I try respect everyone's opinion and how they view things – because I want them to respect me as well.

Golden Rule you know?

Golden Rule.

I was about to stand up to "rescue" Asano Keigo and become everyone's idol for being so brave to stand against this living demon but a voice beat me to it.

"I beg to differ," said a cool voice.

My classmates darted their eyes to the direction of the voice while I didn't bother to do the same as I only cupped my chin and sulked – frustrated for failing to be a hero.

Akuma-sensei shoot a deathly look towards the student at my back, "What is it?"

"Well," a haughty and gruff voice said and for once I was impressed at the voice. It sounded so sure and confident and it doesn't show any sign of cowering. "The part about having fear about shinigamis is downright stupid,"

I sighed. I lost my being impressed already.

"Shinigamis are real. So do aliens, time travelers, sliders and espers,"

Someone stop the person now. He / she is telling preposterous stuffs!

I was waiting for the class to roar in laughter but none came. Instead they kept staring at the person at my back.

Thinking the person is hurt, for everyone in the class thinks the joke is corny, I turned my head and expected that the owner of the voice is probably having his / her face crumpled for preventing an outburst of emotions but –

A deadpanned look greeted me : she was DEAD serious.

Before my eyes is a girl whose looks looked quite mediocre with striking sapphire eyes (yeah right, mediocre my ass) and pale face. But man, her voice is awesome, it sounded like a man.

She was standing there with a deadpanned look and her arms were folded genie-style.

She shot everyone a glare, as if daring them to talk.

No one dared.

Even Akuma-sensei seemed intimidated by her Hitler-like aura. Somehow this made me wanna give out a little "haha" for "Akuma Dynasty" that has just started is already crumbling down to bits.

Serves you right.

"And why pray tell, Kuchiki-san, is your basis for saying that?" Akuma-sensei said. It seemed that I was wrong for thinking that Akuma-sensei would let go without having a fight.

"I'll throw the question back to you, sensei. What is your basis for saying that?"

"I've never seen one," she said in the same level of tone as Kuchiki's. If you'll gonna ask me for my opinion, I think her answer is dumb.

Akuma-sensei might just have that tough façade to compensate her loss of brain. I mean you have to more... uh... scientific? Somewhere along that word.

I think I know what you are currently thinking. This is my reply : I'm not a hypocrite okay!? It's just that I've seen almost all kinds of ghosts and experienced every supernatural stuffs! If you don't accept my explanation then don't. I'm not forcing you.

"So what if you haven't seen one? Those are so precious and dear that they just won't pop out of nowhere and say hello to you,"

A spark came. The one you feel when something hit you. "That's kind of true," I muttered almost incoherently but it seems like Akuma-sensei has razor sharp ears and heard it.

She shot me a glare and that almost gave me a feeling that she's gonna yell at me.

She swung her head to Asano Keigo, telling him to continue.

Just when I thought I was safe, Akuma-sensei declared in full volume :

"Kuchiki and Kurosaki, meet me at detention!"

I clenched my pen so hard which made me thought that the ink inside of it might separate into halves.

She's abusing her power! Damn you Akuma-_yarou_!!!

Detention at the first day?

Great.

This is just exactly what I've imagined.

Thinking this I turned my head around to check Kuchiki's reaction. She was still wearing the same façade and position as if she was a rock.

She's creepy like hell I tell you...

God. I think I now believe in shinigamis.

- - -

_In case you don't know :_

1 – Title means "Melancholy of Kuchiki Rukia".

2 – otaku is an anime lover (as most of us define it) in Japan I think, an otaku is like a freakish male who spends a lot of time in mangas/anime hentais etc.

3 – Akuma means demon.

4 – Shinigamis are well... death gods.

**Author's Note :  
**_There ya go. So how was it? This is a quite-long prologue._

_I bet you already have guesses who will be playing the role of the alien, time-traveler and the esper?_

_See you at the next chapter... if you want me to continue that is._


End file.
